there were, truthfully, many many many things that I'd wanted to share at cell today. upon being asked the question of how has God been a part of my life in the past year, my head were immediately flooded with so many events, so many moments. there were so many, to the point I'd such a hard time even just picking one.

but I guess I'd shared one that was one of the closest to my heart; coming back to God.

the beginning and middle of 2011 had just been so entirely filled with avoidance, hopelessness, moving through life without purpose, without much faith. yet now that I look back, I can see how much I've grown from then till where I am now.

I'd avoided responsibility, confrontations, commitments, people. I'd let my anger and angst cloud over my vision. I'd looked at the world through a cone, unable to see anything else that was hidden from my eyes. I'd embarked a search for a "me", but in the midst of my search, I'd lost who I was in the first place. I'd let opportunities slip by without even identifying that those were opportunities.

everything was pretty much done in the heat of the moment; I didn't cool down until the holidays. and it was in the holidays that I'd reflected. it's the last month of the year already, and I'm still reflecting.

over just these 2 short weeks or so, I'd realised that there's so much to thank God for. the many things that have happened here and there and everywhere, the people that I've come to know or know better, the bonds that have been formed. little showers of blessings everywhere. (:

to end things off... I guess I'm not used to saying certain things, I'm still learning how to get those words out of my mouth without feeling too awkward. but I've gotta start somewhere, so I'll start here.

I can't find the words to thank you enough, for helping me along in school, sharing with me your church and cell, which ultimately brought me back to seeking God. hmmm, and also for "scolding" me when I do stupid things, like pass up golden opportunities and then heavily regretting it.

despite what you think, I'm really really really thankful for getting to know you through last semester and all. I don't really have another word to replace "thank you", but thank you for your guidance all this time. (: